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An Introduction to Intimacy

At the heart of our sexuality is a connection (or lack of one) with another person or other people. Some people like closeness and others don't. Some people want more, some want less. What you want and like is up to you and those you are in relationships with.

We are often socialized to want/expect more or less intimacy because of what others perceive our gender to be... that girls and women should want closeness and be close to others... that boys and men should want independence and distance from others. Gendered expectations about intimacy are problematic when they don't fit who we actually are and what we want. Gender-based social scripts not only put people into boxes, but they tend to create dynamics where one person pursues and the other runs away. By their design, we can end up unhappy and confused. Gendered intimacy scripts are bias-driven, feed on stereotypes, and do not affirm the complexity of gender that most of us experience... especially trans, gender non-conforming, non-binary, gender-expansive, and other people including cisgender people who reject norms that don't fit their desire.

We learn early in life from adults what they think intimacy should be, but those lessons aren't always healthy or right for us as individuals. Each of us can decide what we want intimacy to looks like in our lives and create relationships based on our vision for ourselves!

Intimacy includes the following elements that will be the topic of upcoming blogs:

  • Caring

  • Sharing

  • Loving & Liking

  • Risk Taking

  • Vulnerability

  • Self Disclosure

  • Trust

Social Media Post to Share with Friends.

Want to share this information with someone on social media? Check out Cooper's "Intimacy" post on Instagram @supportpupcooper. Check out his Sex Ed Posts highlights to find all the sex ed posts easily.

Want support with your sexuality or relationships?

Support Pup Cooper is a coach and educator who helps pups and kinksters with their sexuality and relationships. He can support all kinds of goals, like improving your sex life, getting more from your relationships, understanding yourself, exploring kink and pup life, and more!

Click here to book a free 30-minute online session and learn how Cooper can help you!


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